You called me a cold hearted bitch
You called me a cold hearted bitch
And since you gave me that label
I’ve been finding myself playing that role
I guess it’s true what they say
What you put out in the world really does become your reality
Or as white people would say you “manifested” my destiny
But I’ve been called names all my life
Black girl
Mulatto
Bitch
Whore,
But I’m not any of them
I’m not your sweetheart
Your bae
You Whottie
Your homie
Shorty
Yeah
Knick knack patty wack niggah get the fuck on with that shit!
I learned a long time ago it’s not what they call you it’s what you answer to
I am a black woman!
The alpha and the Omega
Every person in this room came from my womb..
No matter how many white excavationists want to try to erase it..
The first feet on this earth were black ones
The first child that was born had kinky hair and a wide nose
The hips that bore it were wide like mine.
The tits that nursed it were large and had brown Ariolas
No matter how much you want to put that white woman you have on your arm on a pedestal
She doesn’t compare to me.
I am magical
I am ethereal
And if that offends you
I’m not sorry
Be grateful for the black woman
Be grateful for me
Because in every turn of the century we’ve saved the world without asking for a thank you.
But I thank you
Because I know the words I said tonight hurt someone
But you will come up to me after the show with smile on your face
You’ll Leave knowing that it hit that weird place in your brain that always tugs at you when a black woman get called beautiful
It hurts you
It bothers you
It pisses you the fuck off
So much so that your soul shivers
You’ll go back into your white clique and say
I hate that they have to go through that
But will ignore your contributions to my alienation
My otherness
You seem to forget my reality
The words you’ve said about me
The way you feel when I get the promotion you felt you had the right to
You forget when you called the cops on the little girl with nappy hair
Trying to earn money so she would have money to play with the same brand of dolls the white girls had
You said those things out of your mouth
Those words
Tried to break me
Tried to kill me
And even renamed me
But I don’t have white tears
Or the ability to act fragile.
Behind a page face and soft features
My jaw bone is strong
My lips are big
My nose is large
So I can’t hide from it
And I don’t want to
And that’s Society
And that’s the truth
But you heard from black lips
So it won’t be true until a thin white woman comes and says what I said
But with less rhythm
Less zeale
But what she said would have come from thin lips and soft voice
Completely plagiarizing
My story
My reality
My story
The authenticity of the black woman has always be challenged
Always been questioned
But to that I say
Well Ain’t I a woman?
Ain’t I a woman
Ain’t I a woman
Yes
I always imitated
Never duplicated
Yes I am Woman
Black woman
Metaphysically
Phenomenally
Me!
by Michelah Desnai
Michelah Desnai is an Artist of many Mediums who is currently residing in Glasgow, Scotland where she is working towards her Phd in Film and Theatre. Originally from Falls Church, Virginia, Michelah has been striving for her artistic dreams all over the world. After completing her Bachelor's degree from Manhattan College, she accepted a theatre internship in Auckland, New Zealand working for Massive Theatre Company. She then moved from New Zealand to Paris, France to pursue a Master’s Degree from the American University of Paris - where she resided while working as an actor and Singer playing shows all over Europe.
When the pandemic hit Michelah was out of work and moved to Jeonju-Si, South Korea to take a job, while also pursuing her modelling career. Now living in Glasgow, Michelah is working in many mediums and expressing herself through all forms of Art that her heart desires. She recently put on her play “Roads ‘S’ Traveled” with Unshaded Arts Theatre Company, among other exciting artistic adventures.