Ramblings of a Born-Again Sinner
For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard.” -Matthew 20:1
We see what the kingdom of heaven is like... But what is god like?
We didn’t fail god
god failed us
God is like a child with a “Do Not Enter” sign on his bedroom door. You draw closer, he draws
further way.
With each step toward him, he takes one back.
God is like
a father that walked out on his child.
The child abandoned asking what they did wrong.
god left his people
Long before the “salvation” in the desert.
Long before the exodus.
God left us in the garden
half-naked
exiled.
The first father
Walked out on his first child
Sins of the father as they say
God is like
a distorted mirror
We were created by him
In his image.
How vain
With the task
to love him.
How selfish.
To create something Just for it to love you.
How pathetic.
God is like
the child that
Tires of a toy after he breaks it.
Tossing it aside to collect dust.
God is like
the Fuckboy
That you want to feel closer to
Promises of
Love
Safety
Security
But
Sin disfigured us.
Made us ugly to him.
Ghosted by the Holy
God is like
the teacher that fails his students
Testing us
But
He created a test with no right answers.
And told us to pass.
Knowing we’d fail.
Fuck the test.
He failed us,
Not because we ate the fruit
but because he already ate it too.
God is like
The therapist
You go to at
Your most desperate
Weakest
Most vulnerable
He mocks your weakness
Twists the knife
In your mind
Mutilates your thoughts Nothing left but a
Lobotomized husk
God is like
The rebel leader
His gaslit torch
Promising
Rebellion
Disruption
Revolution
All the while Sowing seeds of
Conformity
Corruption
Suppression
His perfection is a lie.
Thinking if they were better
Then dad would have stayed.
The father failed his child.
God failed his children.
God’s not dead, he’s just not here right now.
God is like
The landowner
That hikes the rent
He works you in his fields
Only for you
To pay him back the wage
As you toil for your pennies
He snatches them away
Yes, god’s kingdom is like a landowner
who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard.
by Rae Lee