Letter to My Body

As I press my pen to the page—

Do I state my truth in shrewd elegance

or does one

Simply scribble their deranged

Thoughts until the blank paper

Transforms into an otherworldly colour?

Otherworldly.

Such a word graces the page boldly.

As I peer into the mirror,

It is what I see

when I place judgment

upon my shape.

I find it peculiar.

Unlike anything on earth.

Undesirable.

I’m not plump in the right places.

Not the body one would see

On the cover of a magazine.

Not the girl everyone longs to be.

Unless she is between worlds

Of slim and thick.

I’ve prayed by the bedside.

Hoping someday,

I would not be overlooked

But perhaps treasured in a gallery.

The ideal piece of art

Gawked at thoughtlessly

To be admired by all.

Studied for centuries

As the highest regard of beauty.

If this mirror were a book

It would tell you in sheer honesty—

I am mismatched.

They forgotten to create

A category for me.

If I smash the glass in a fit of rage

Does my blood reject my point of view

To spell the word beautiful?

Because what would moving

my body into a box do for me

If it only suffocated to exist as I am?

by Rachel Barduhn

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Young love spoils too soon—

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Grief